Beloved and I got gift cards for Christmas from my parents. I dragged Beloved and the little angel into Old Navy at the mall last weekend to see if I could get a pair of skinny jeans that didn't make me look like sausage links (found some, thank you sweetheart cut). Beloved was shocked I would even try to put something from Old Navy on my body because y'all, we are old. Then Beloved insisted we go mall-walking, because the only time we go in the mall is to take the little angel to blow all her Hoggin Craft money on her burgeoning Build-a-Bear collection.
Around the mall we went, peering in store windows. Finally, we walked out through Sears. We always park by Sears. Nobody is ever in Sears.
"What is with all this slim-fit men's clothing?" Beloved finally said. "Straight pants, slim-fit shirts? What the hell?"
I stopped walking and looked at him. He was totally serious. He was PUT OUT by the slim-fit.
I started laughing.
BECAUSE NOW HE KNOWS WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO BE A WOMAN IN ANY STORE, EVER.