TWEETDECK -- In a flurry of keystrokes and a fierce show of power, several alpha bloggers unexpectedly turned on raisins yesterday under the hashtag #bloggersagainstraisins.
The first tweet came from Yvonne Marie of Joy Unexpected. Within minutes, others followed suit.
"Raisins could have been wine," wrote Catherine Conners of Her Bad Mother.
"Raisins ruin cinnamon rolls," responded Yvonne Marie.
Within the hour, raisins had been accused of ruining four different types of baked goods and being the fruit of the devil.
"It was merciless," said an insider familiar with the Raisin family. "These bloggers can take anyone down. It's just not fair."
"Why does the Internet suddenly hate raisins? Is this a thing, now? A trending topic?" asked Alice Bradley of Finslippy, after reading the onslaught.
Called "the new old boys'club," mommybloggers wield the power of the pocketbook, and as of late, they've not been afraid to use it.
"I don't know what I did," said Roy Raisin, chairman of Raisins Without Borders. "I totally bought Sleep Is for the Weak. I even gave it away to a pregnant friend."
As the blogosphere rattled with tweets, insiders speculated it might be blowback from a renegade raisin who briefly took over Rita Arens' Twitter account after she refused to accept money for tweeting "I love raisins."
"I just can't get into sponsored tweets," said Arens. "I can't believe that raisin had the nerve to come into my house like that. Have raisins no shame?"
"We had nothing to do with that raisin," said Roy Raisin. "He went totally rogue. We only do paid advertising sometimes cause-based marketing with the Cran people. We've never met Ms. Arens, though I'm sure she's lovely."Chocolate chip, whom the bloggers sided with on the matter of cookies, had no comment and didn't answer Surrender, Dorothy's e-mails.
As of press time, the raisins had taken to a small red box to plan their next move. "What they'll do next is anyone's guess," said a bystander. "But someone's got to stop those bloggers."
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