I noticed that Rockstar Mommy has ended her blog.
I liked reading Rockstar Mommy. I'll miss her. I also miss Chookooloonks and the Naked Ovary and the other bloggers who have folded it up in the years since I started blogging.
Many bloggers talk about the siren song of the Internet, and how it begins to take over your life. I had a period like that with blogging about a year in, but it's faded since then. Blogging gets me writing every day, and some days it's good and some days it's bad, but at least I'm writing at least five days a week these past four years, and it's the first time in this writer's life I've had the discipline to do that.
Of course, I don't spend as much time on some entries as others. Most of my posts take about ten minutes. The ones I do for BlogHer are much longer -- a few hours -- and the reviews, of course, take the time of reviewing. I don't know if I've found "balance" with my blog, but I struggle for balance in every area of my life. Since the little angel was born, I've become very compartmentalized. The blog is just another slot into which I pour certain emotions and behaviors that are separate from those I use for work or for parenting or for my friends or husband or family. The blog, though, is the only part of my life that is all mine, and I can't imagine giving it up for that reason. I don't criticize Rockstar Mommy or any of the others for closing up shop, but I don't understand. Perhaps they have other outlets. Perhaps they don't itch to write. Or maybe they do, and they're off penning fabulous novels or something. (Quite possible.)
The Internet hasn't really taken over my life, though. I know that from the thousands of Bloglines entries that I'm behind. I know that because I realized this week that I hadn't realized Cagey's aunt had died (which made me feel like a horrible real-life friend). I know that because I'm not even up on current events. The Internet is like my work, like my family, like my books -- a source of endless information I will never even begin to absorb. So I don't try. I just try to get a little something written every weekday, because no matter what else happened that day, I feel better if I've written something, captured a funny moment, cataloged my experience for myself and my family and for my own posterity. I love you all, and I'm always happy to see my stats rise, but I'm thankful for the blog because it keeps me writing, and I know I'd have to keep doing it even if nobody dropped by ever. I like the idea of sending my words out into the world, with the hope, however corny it may be, that they'll find someone at the other end of the ether, a message in the modern-day bottle. We who send messages in bottles do it knowing full well they may never be received. Blogs are like that -- we don't know if anyone will read. We hope they will, but we send them out because we need to, regardless of audience.
I suspect if you lose that feeling, then that's when blogging becomes work. And if it becomes work, then you better be getting paid, my friends, or it's wise to turn your energy to something more fulfilling.
Farewell, Rockstar Mommy. Embrace that life of yours.
