Were You Raised by Wolves?

Let me begin by saying Christie Mellor had me at Three-Martini Playdate.  Her book was one that inspired me to begin working on my mommyblogging anthology.  She rocks.

Were You Raised by Wolves? Clues to the Mysteries of Adulthood is Mellor's first foray out of the parenting space in print form, a book for twenty-somethings who've just left the nest.  It was sent to me by the always-fabulous Parent Blogger Network. It is hilarious, and a tad too familiar at times.

With sections on cooking, how to clean your toilet, starting your first job, what not to do while drunk and many other helpful topics, Mellor doesn't fail us.  I'll just quote a few choice areas.

On your new job:

Listen, you just started three days ago, and no one wants to tell you this, but somebody has to:  quit sidling up to our cubicles and getting all chummy with us.  We don't know you. We might have wanted to get to know you, but within an hour of your arrival you started swaggering around like you've had this job for fifteen years and you're everybody's best buddy. No, you giant ass.  I've been working here for fifteen years.  You are the new guy.

On Old Spice deodorant:

No good can come from having your deodorant stick double as your cologne.  Perhaps you like the retro-kitch cachet, but do not partake of the Old Spice, as it will cause anyone within a fifteen-yard radius to immediately experience flu-like symptoms and upper-eye numbness.  It actually burns the inner nostrils. It is the napalm of man-scent.

These are just a few of the delightful tidbits of knowledge to be had in Mellor's latest book. Run, don't walk, to your local bookseller and order 80 copies for all of the young people you know now or will know in the future.

Seriously.